The stuffs in my office
The stuff in my office needs organizing. One day I’ll get to it. One of these days when I have nothing to do.
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THE DOG WITH TWO EARS
Ijapa (Mr. Tortoise) went and bought Aja (the Dog) in the market.
Ijapa took Aja home.
The following day, Ijapa put Aja on a leash, and told Aja, “Let’s go out.”
Aja was surprised that he was put on a leash.
He had never been put on a leash before.
Aja asked Ijapa, “Where are we going?”
Ijapa answered, “To the market.”
THE PAID OFFICERS BOAST…
THE PAID OFFICERS BOAST THEY DID THE KILLING, MAIMING AND DESTRUCTION OF PROPERTIES
To those who obey orders to kill and maim:
To those whose salaries, allowances and food are from the business of death:
Let nobody convince you that you could kill another HUMAN, and remain alive and well.
Let nobody persuade you that killing and maiming people is a legitimate job.
My anti-coronavirus Esu.
My anti-coronavirus Esu.
I produced this Esu object and hung it in front of my door.
My house is marked safe.
When their Agent of Death is passing by, it sees the Esu object.
Esu, the gatekeeper, informs the Agent of Death that “He doesn’t live here. He lives on the other street.”
SOJA GO, SOJA COME
Muhamadu Buhari, the president of our terminally sick Nigeria, just did what soldiers have been doing since I was ten years old—he kicked out some old soldiers, and replaced them with some old soldiers.
Buhari kicked out Chief of Defence Staff, General Abayomi Olonisakin;
Chief of Army Staff, Lt-Gen. Tukur Buratai;
Chief of Naval Staff, Vice Admiral Ibok Ekwe Ibas;
and Chief of Air Staff, Air Marshal Sadique Abubakar.
ENGLISHMAN IN BENIN CITY, 1981 (Part Thirteen)
As Rufus exited the buka, it was clear that Obaseki was disappointed.
With Madam Ngu and Prof. Wangboje present at the dining table, the circumstances for a total mediation of the crisis were perfect.
They would have just instructed Rufus to cut it, and that would have been the end. Obaseki could not have wished for a better opportunity.
But Rufus left to start his audition with his theater students without the discussion of the crisis coming up. One thing was certain: Rufus was mad and did not hide it.
TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE
My friend called me that they scammed her of $750 last Monday.
After listening to the story of how they scammed her, I realized it was the same syndicate that scammed me in 2019 that scammed her last Monday.
As a Nigerian, I consider it a disgrace to be scammed—after all, I belong to a country that is notorious for always winning the Olympic gold medal in the 419 game.