a picture showing moyo okediji sitting next to his artwork

GOOD FAKE NEWS

ByMoyo Okediji

Photo: still in solitary confinement at home.

I’m not taking the vaccine.

Not yet.

Waiting to see what happens.

The lack of sunlight is depleting the melanin shield of my skin.

But I take Vitamin D supplements to compensate for a lack of access to sunlight.

Last night I was looking for my pet elephant and discovered it was hiding inside my beard.

That’s fake news.

Good fake news.

a picture showing moyo okedijis granddaughter

My granddaughter fine sha!

ByMoyo Okediji

My granddaughter fine sha!

Those of you who don’t have granddaughters, Olodumare will pese o.

But your granddaughter still won’t be as fine as mine o: just so you know. Kẹ́lẹ́gbẹ́ mẹgbẹ́.

She already eats amala and okra like a professional at seven months.

When we visit Nigeria after the Koro, she will take a tour of all the major Amala joints in Ibadan, starting from Inanstrate at Mokola.

a picture showing moyo okediji sitting next to his artwork

SOJA GO, SOJA COME

ByMoyo Okediji

Muhamadu Buhari, the president of our terminally sick Nigeria, just did what soldiers have been doing since I was ten years old—he kicked out some old soldiers, and replaced them with some old soldiers.

Buhari kicked out Chief of Defence Staff, General Abayomi Olonisakin;

Chief of Army Staff, Lt-Gen. Tukur Buratai;

Chief of Naval Staff, Vice Admiral Ibok Ekwe Ibas;

and Chief of Air Staff, Air Marshal Sadique Abubakar.

a picture showing moyo okediji poised for the camera

Igbohoism

ByMoyo Okediji

What is Igbohoism?

1. You need drinking water. You pay taxes to the government. The government refuses to provide you with drinking water, because the politicians would rather steal your money for their own personal purposes.

You dig water wells to provide you with water to drink and use for your household needs.

That is Igbohoism.